The other post after retrieval. I found out writing heals. As a self-proclaimed depressed person, this is one of the platforms to channel my depression. It helps most of the time.
Not many read my post, and I hope it stays. As an introvert (well, self-proclaimed too), talking to others can be tiresome. There will be a Q&A session. I don't enjoy it, but I want to be heard. That's the problem.
Well then, I hope I can write more. Facebook will never be my favourite place to rant.
09 August 2019
15 October 2015
#15102015 Too much caffeine
A cup (ok, it was a big mug) of hot mint mocha to start my day was a blessing. Other than being alive for another day, of course, and my body is still operating and I can see the blue skies and green trees and...Yes, there are a lot :)
But then, too much caffeine made me grumpy and jumpy. I wanted to sing loudly in my cubicle, I wanted to regurgitate some of my very special kids, I talked very fast and I hope my kids could understand, and I made one of my awesome teams sang Queen's "We will rock you." and it wasn't in my English space, it was History. Made an attempt to make the song a class anthem and asked the kids to look for the lyric. Let's see what will happen next week.
An eccentric adult with a lot of dreams channeling her inner craziness towards her innocent kids. Heh
But then, too much caffeine made me grumpy and jumpy. I wanted to sing loudly in my cubicle, I wanted to regurgitate some of my very special kids, I talked very fast and I hope my kids could understand, and I made one of my awesome teams sang Queen's "We will rock you." and it wasn't in my English space, it was History. Made an attempt to make the song a class anthem and asked the kids to look for the lyric. Let's see what will happen next week.
An eccentric adult with a lot of dreams channeling her inner craziness towards her innocent kids. Heh
It goes like
A: Hey you!
B: What?me?
A: Yes, you!
A: Because we will rock you
#lamejoke #iknow
13 October 2015
#13102015 Tell and make them understand
So, I have these two kids in my little space. They have problem in understanding instructions and facts. You know, those jumpy kids, loud and energetic. Lectures are so not their cup of tea. But then, I always push them to do the tasks. This is because, you never know your limit unless you are being pushed.
Today, in my little space, I asked my kids to form few groups so that they can do the group activities easily. Then, these two kids, jokingly said that they don't want to do the task. So, I gave them options: if you don't want to be in the groups and do the task, stand for the whole period or do and sit. I know, it's cruel. They decided to not carry on their task and stood under the sun. After 20 minutes, they eventually gave up and said they want to do the task and they finished it in less than 5 minutes. hah.
It was not my decision, it was theirs. They chose to stand and not doing their works. It was the consequences of their choice. They didn't try, and made their decision recklessly.
But then, to be fair, these students don't know exactly the path they are heading to by making such decision. And I SHOULD tell them.
I didn't tell the whole reason of giving them options. I didn't tell that this was not a punishment, but it was a lesson for you to learn. I didn't tell that bad decision will make you suffer. I didn't tell that a decision cause a great effect to your life.
I didn't tell them anything. So, they can't understand why I'm doing that. Not for today, because I plan to tell them tomorrow. I hope it is not too late.
Despite of not doing their work and always receive a motherly (and corporal) punishment(?) from me, they still want to come to my little space and get extra nagging from me. They don't hold grudge. They can be so annoying but they can be adorable too with their silly antics. One of my kids pronounce 'Orang Bugis' (the Buginese) as 'Orang Bogel' (naked people). You can't find that in other places than this little space.
I just hope they learn something beneficial from today's little space :)
Today, in my little space, I asked my kids to form few groups so that they can do the group activities easily. Then, these two kids, jokingly said that they don't want to do the task. So, I gave them options: if you don't want to be in the groups and do the task, stand for the whole period or do and sit. I know, it's cruel. They decided to not carry on their task and stood under the sun. After 20 minutes, they eventually gave up and said they want to do the task and they finished it in less than 5 minutes. hah.
It was not my decision, it was theirs. They chose to stand and not doing their works. It was the consequences of their choice. They didn't try, and made their decision recklessly.
But then, to be fair, these students don't know exactly the path they are heading to by making such decision. And I SHOULD tell them.
I didn't tell the whole reason of giving them options. I didn't tell that this was not a punishment, but it was a lesson for you to learn. I didn't tell that bad decision will make you suffer. I didn't tell that a decision cause a great effect to your life.
I didn't tell them anything. So, they can't understand why I'm doing that. Not for today, because I plan to tell them tomorrow. I hope it is not too late.
Despite of not doing their work and always receive a motherly (and corporal) punishment(?) from me, they still want to come to my little space and get extra nagging from me. They don't hold grudge. They can be so annoying but they can be adorable too with their silly antics. One of my kids pronounce 'Orang Bugis' (the Buginese) as 'Orang Bogel' (naked people). You can't find that in other places than this little space.
I just hope they learn something beneficial from today's little space :)
Credit to: noumanazhar2013.tumblr
#12102015 The Change
Wow, i thought that I had already forgotten my password, and I can only read it. After a(n) (un)difficult attempt, now I am writing this entry.
Change is inevitable. Everyone will change, every living organisms need the change. No one want to live in a static and constant life; no risk, no challenge, nothing. So, for 2015, the biggest change that I have taken so far is when I chose to be in this teaching field.
This is not for sure the most fancy job in the world. It looks easy on the surface but hella challenging. I have more downs than the ups moment. I fought with my kids (read: students) and I nag a lot. I spend more money for my kids than for my mom, but still, I don't get the respect I want from some of the kids. Quitting this job always comes into my mind whenever a very worst moment occur. But then, there were moments that make me feel ' Yes, I wanna be here, with them.' Although those moments can be counted, but still they are very precious.
We should change before we assume others to change. That's is the rule that makes me sane and makes me moving. And success will only be attained after thousand failures. Like a caterpillar transforms into a beautiful butterfly, we will transform into a better person, one day.
Change is inevitable. Everyone will change, every living organisms need the change. No one want to live in a static and constant life; no risk, no challenge, nothing. So, for 2015, the biggest change that I have taken so far is when I chose to be in this teaching field.
This is not for sure the most fancy job in the world. It looks easy on the surface but hella challenging. I have more downs than the ups moment. I fought with my kids (read: students) and I nag a lot. I spend more money for my kids than for my mom, but still, I don't get the respect I want from some of the kids. Quitting this job always comes into my mind whenever a very worst moment occur. But then, there were moments that make me feel ' Yes, I wanna be here, with them.' Although those moments can be counted, but still they are very precious.
We should change before we assume others to change. That's is the rule that makes me sane and makes me moving. And success will only be attained after thousand failures. Like a caterpillar transforms into a beautiful butterfly, we will transform into a better person, one day.
this sounds too serious to begin with :))
05 January 2014
#050114
Tahun bersilih ganti, adakah resolusi diri masih ditakuk lama? Sudahkah berubah ke arah yang lebih baik? Atau masih seperti dulu? Melayan internet sampai tidak sedar masa berlalu, menonton drama dan movie sampai berjam-jam lamanya, menggaru-garu kepala yang gatal dan berfikir kosong. Kemudian, menerawang sendiri kenapa perlu dilakukan semua itu, dan kitaran yang sama, perkara yang sama, soalan yang sama akan dilafazkan.
Sudahlah anda, pembetulan kertas itu perlu dibuat. Khabarnya mahu mula mereka dan menulis tajuk untuk proses pembelajaran yang seterusnya. Jikalau sanggup mengambil risiko dan jalan tersebut, perlulah lebih fokus. Perlulah lebih kuat semangatnya. Perlulah lebih bijak pendapatnya. Perlulah lebih matang pemikirannya. Bukan hanya memandang sepi lembaran buku yang tersusun rapi di tepi meja itu, tidak juga mengeluh tatkala membaca bait-bait tulisan sendiri.
Pos-pos awal tahun memang begini ya caranya? Konon mahu berubah, tapi akhirnya, masih ditakuk lama. Kita tengok pos awal tahun depan, bagaimana rupanya. Dan, tajuk pos dan aku adalah perkara yang tidak sehaluan. Kerap mempunyai pendapat dan isi yang berbeza.
Because I'm living with two different person inside.
Sudahlah anda, pembetulan kertas itu perlu dibuat. Khabarnya mahu mula mereka dan menulis tajuk untuk proses pembelajaran yang seterusnya. Jikalau sanggup mengambil risiko dan jalan tersebut, perlulah lebih fokus. Perlulah lebih kuat semangatnya. Perlulah lebih bijak pendapatnya. Perlulah lebih matang pemikirannya. Bukan hanya memandang sepi lembaran buku yang tersusun rapi di tepi meja itu, tidak juga mengeluh tatkala membaca bait-bait tulisan sendiri.
Pos-pos awal tahun memang begini ya caranya? Konon mahu berubah, tapi akhirnya, masih ditakuk lama. Kita tengok pos awal tahun depan, bagaimana rupanya. Dan, tajuk pos dan aku adalah perkara yang tidak sehaluan. Kerap mempunyai pendapat dan isi yang berbeza.
Because I'm living with two different person inside.
29 October 2013
Kekuatan Minda (uih meremang)
Minggu ini, sebelum sampai Shah Alam lagi,orang itu sudah berbisik pada diri sendiri, "Selagi tak habis benda ni, kamu jangan balik kampung!!" Kedengarannya sangat bersemangat. Memang bersemangat. Mana tidaknya, kerja yang sepatutnya siap ditangguhkan ke satu masa lain. Itu kuasa minda yang sedar.
Berkobarnya minda yang sedar itu membawa badan ke perpustakaan. Peluang menyiapkan kerja jauh lebih cerah berbanding di rumah. Berniat untuk bermalam di situ juga.
Menariknya, malam pertama sahaja sudah mengantuk tidak terkira. Diketuk-ketuk kepala, diratah gula-gula, diteguk air serakusnya tetap tiada kesan. Minda sudah menerawang ke mana, hinggakan perkataan Bahasa Inggeris dilihat Melayu. Lalu, diambil keputusan melelapkan mata seketika sambil melentokkan kepala di meja.
Pada ketika minda separuh sedar itu, datang pula fikiran mengatakan, "Liyana, kamu kentut." Dengan sedikit kesedaran yang ada, terus ditutup suis minda dan badan untuk kelihatan tidak sedar. Biar mereka tidak mengenali siapa orang itu, biar kisah itu terkenal melalui mulut-mulut orang tanpa mereka mengetahui siapa yang membuat onarnya. Biar, biar.
Heyyy....lain kali berhenti makan sebelum kenyang, bukan sampai berangin.
Atau, adakah ini rancangan kejam minda untuk meletakkan orang itu dalam situasi yang 'awkward'? Sedangkan tiada perkara sedemikian pun yang terjadi?Hanya Allah dan mereka yang duduk di kawasan sekitar yang mengetahui. Wallaua'lam.
Berkobarnya minda yang sedar itu membawa badan ke perpustakaan. Peluang menyiapkan kerja jauh lebih cerah berbanding di rumah. Berniat untuk bermalam di situ juga.
Menariknya, malam pertama sahaja sudah mengantuk tidak terkira. Diketuk-ketuk kepala, diratah gula-gula, diteguk air serakusnya tetap tiada kesan. Minda sudah menerawang ke mana, hinggakan perkataan Bahasa Inggeris dilihat Melayu. Lalu, diambil keputusan melelapkan mata seketika sambil melentokkan kepala di meja.
Pada ketika minda separuh sedar itu, datang pula fikiran mengatakan, "Liyana, kamu kentut." Dengan sedikit kesedaran yang ada, terus ditutup suis minda dan badan untuk kelihatan tidak sedar. Biar mereka tidak mengenali siapa orang itu, biar kisah itu terkenal melalui mulut-mulut orang tanpa mereka mengetahui siapa yang membuat onarnya. Biar, biar.
Heyyy....lain kali berhenti makan sebelum kenyang, bukan sampai berangin.
Atau, adakah ini rancangan kejam minda untuk meletakkan orang itu dalam situasi yang 'awkward'? Sedangkan tiada perkara sedemikian pun yang terjadi?Hanya Allah dan mereka yang duduk di kawasan sekitar yang mengetahui. Wallaua'lam.
18 October 2013
Itu
Semangat itu sudah hilang.
Hilang dipuput angin sore yang bertiup di balik dedaunan.
Mungkin perlukan motivasi,
mungkin perlukan sedikit semangat,
mungkin perlukan rasa marah daripada siapa-siapa.
Alasan, alasan, dan alasan.
Lagi, lagi, dan lagi.
Minda celaru, hati terpaku.
Hasilnya nanti?
"Jangan kau kata kau bertawakkal dan redha dengan apa yang diberi-Nya"
kerana kau tidak layak untuk bertawakkal lagi jika usaha mu tidak setinggi gunung, jika doamu tidak menggapai langit ke tujuh.
Hilang dipuput angin sore yang bertiup di balik dedaunan.
Mungkin perlukan motivasi,
mungkin perlukan sedikit semangat,
mungkin perlukan rasa marah daripada siapa-siapa.
Alasan, alasan, dan alasan.
Lagi, lagi, dan lagi.
Minda celaru, hati terpaku.
Hasilnya nanti?
"Jangan kau kata kau bertawakkal dan redha dengan apa yang diberi-Nya"
kerana kau tidak layak untuk bertawakkal lagi jika usaha mu tidak setinggi gunung, jika doamu tidak menggapai langit ke tujuh.
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